Asteroid vs Earth full movie review - Asteroids, submarines and the Mount of Doom
I just got through watching this on the telly, since I often try to catch all the Asylum -projects I can out of sheer curiosity.
The plot of this epic revolves around the Deep Impact / Armageddon -style asteroid that is hurling towards us and can't be blown up or thrown out of it's course. The best option they come up with is to bury nuclear weapons to the bottom of the planet and explode whole Earth out of it's course thus easily avoiding the deadly impact.
I'll admit I'm no geologist or scientist of any creed, but even to the complete layman this sounds like a legit plan that can in no way backfire or cause any harm to our entire ecosystem. And the whole thing is orchestrated by a temp in NASA, who happens to be smarter than all the science minds of the nation combined.
Tia Carrere plays a geologist that gets involved with the mission, and Robert Davi is a general of the army.
I have always appreciated Carrere, because even at the height of her popularity, she often appeared in all things cheap and stupid. She is rather okay in this, although not as lovely as Renee O'Connor one could see in the Moby Dick interpretation of the same firm - which is probably shot in the same submarine set as most of this film.
Davi's only point is to look concerned and drink a lot of coffee.
This movie had a lot of good brain fart mentality. The biggest problem with Asylum these days is that their movies have become too coherent and can only be distinguished from the normal Hollywood crap by their cheapness. Asteroid vs Earth was like if Ronald Emmerich had £3 cash and was even more crazy as the reality shows - and that's a good thing.
We had a nice scene, where the sub has a leak at it's backside, so they device an explosion to separate only the front part of the vehicle and continue with just that. Or how about the ending, where we go into The Lord of the Rings -territory, as one soldier has to try and smuggle few nukes up a roaring volcano whilst avoiding enemies surrounding the mountain.
And in the end, world literally jumps from it's orbit in a scene that looks like it has been directly lifted from the intro sequence of 3rd Rock from the Sun. In horrible, horrible CGI, of course - as is everything in this piece.
This gets an okay score in terms of Asylum films from me. I wasn't disappointed, because this time the dumb cheese translated as entertainment, not a boring snooze fest.