Mega Python vs. Gatoroid full movie review - Why did I just watch this?
Mega Python vs. Gatoroid starts in the Florida Everglades where animal rights activist & environmentalist Dr. Nikki Riley (Debbie Gibson) releases several large Python she had earlier freed from a scientific research laboratory.
Park ranger Terry O'Hara (Tiffany) has seen a sharp decrease in the local Alligator population & soon discovers that the huge Python's have been killing them, Terry issues hunting permits to kill the Python's & restore natures balance but her fiancé Justin (Carey Van Dyke) is attacked & killed by one of the giant Snake's which upsets Terry, a lot. Angry Terry injects some dead Chicken meat with experimental growth hormones & feeds it to some Alligator's who grow to an enormous size, Terry feels the giant Alligator's will the giant Python's but instead the giant Alligaotr's & giant Python's just decide to kill anything & everything. Terry & Nikki have to work together to defeat the monster sized reptiles.
Directed by Mary Lambert this is another vs. creature feature film made by The Asylum for the Sy Fy Channel, having already endured Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus (2009) & Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus (2010) I thought I was prepared for anything but the level at which Mega Python vs. Gatoroid sucks at even surprised me. Now, there are some filmmakers that have a bad reputation & if their name is attached to a film then beware but The Asylum is fast becoming the studio to avoid, have they ever made a half decent film let alone a good one? They don't care, they are rip-off merchants who come up with great titles & package their films in boxes with cool artwork but the films themselves are always total crap, just like Mega Python vs. Gatoroid in fact. This is not a film, it's an absolute mess of bad CGI computer effects, hilariously bad acting, wretched character's & awful dialogue along with a totally random plot that makes no coherent sense or logic whatsoever. Don't give me the 'it's so bad it's good' clichéd crap either as Mega Python vs. Gatoroid is anything but good or fun. Sure, it moves along like a rocket & it has it's fair share of laughs with some unintentionally hilarious CGI & dialogue but when all said & done Mega Python vs. Gatoroid is painful to watch. There's no great reason as to why the Python's change from normal sized ones when Nikki releases them to huge monsters a day or so later & why the Alligator's end up huge is also stupid with Tiffany feeding them Chicken full of something or other that some guy gave her in one of the dumbest plans ever conceived in a film as Tiffany decides to create huge killer Alligator's to kill the huge killer Python's but obviously didn't think her plan through. Mega Python vs. Gatoroid is full of the dumbest scenes you can imagine, scenes that make no sense & will leave you amazed by their stupidness. Then, at the end the powers that be decide to honour the two women who released dozens of giant killer reptiles that caused the death's of countless people by naming a park after them! This film is just head shakingly bad from start to finish, it seems to have been written as they were filming & is truly a disaster from start to finish.
Aren't CGI computer effects supposed to get better over time? Aren't they supposed to evolve? As far as these crappy creature feature films go they seem to be getting worse, Mega Python vs. Gatoroid features some of the worst CGI computer effects I have ever seen, they are embarrassingly bad. They are awful. There are a few 80's pop song references with nice ones for 'I Think We're Alone Now' & 'Only in My Dreams' & some of one-liners between Tiffany & Debbie Gibson is amusing as is the cat-fight the two have but the films still crap. There's a bit of gore but not much, there's a dead body with it's limbs severed, a severed head & some blood splatter but not much else. The editing is also horrible although the badly timed & rendered CGI doesn't exactly help make the action & certain scenes seamless.
Although set in the Florida Everglades this was filmed in Los Angeles, as cheaply as possible. This is just awful filmmaking, everything is amateurish & badly done. The two 80's pop stars Tiffany & Debbie Gibson are game & give it their best but so what? The rest of the cast are stuck with awful dialogue & basically suck.
Mega Python vs. Gatoroid is a terrible film, sure it's trying to be fun & maybe even slightly bad on purpose but blimey, this bad? A really boring & inept waste of 87 minutes, the type of film that gives even crappy Sy Fy Channel creature features a bad name. A great title, a fun sounding plot & great artwork on the box is all fine but the actual film is horrendously bad.